Bad or Terrible?

I have to thank the film Alive or Dead for teaching me some important truths. I would like to pass these truths on to you, my readers, in hopes that if the situation ever occurs, you will be prepared.

The first truth that I learned is that if a wooden door is slammed on your finger, it will be completely severed. Don't think that you need sharp edges, blunt edges do just fine.

The second truth is that crazy, inbred cannibals live in fairly clean cabins filled with well written correspondence that they can somehow read even though they seem to lack any type of cognitive thought.

The third truth is that two women who lack any knowledge or understanding how to operate a vehicle with a manual transmission can suddenly gain the ability to drive such vehicle once a traumatic situation has occurred.

Now, I tell you these important truths out of my love for humanity. And I will also let you in on what may be the most important thing you will ever learn:

NEVER WATCH THE FILM ALIVE OR DEAD, unless of course you want to watch a film riddled with plot holes, cheap gore, and acting that would make a porn star blush. 

Thursday

So it's Thursday. What should I write about. Let me write about the history of Thursday's past. Thursday's began around the same time as the rest of the days. Actually 5 days after. Many things have happened on Thursdays, some more important than others. I would like to dwell on one Thursday event which will sit well in all our memories. This event is very momentous and the world will doubtfully be the same. The writing of this post. I know. Some of you may not read this post on Thursday, but on another day. But that doesn't matter in the history books. After all history happens and then is slowly revealed to the public (some being blessed enough to learn about it and from it earlier than others.

What I have to remind all of you of is that with this privilege comes responsibility...the responsibility to learn and pass on what you have learned. I will leave you all with a question...What have you learned today?

The sky

I was about to start writing a meaningless entry regarding typing with one hand while talking on the phone (which is, of course, clenched in the other, thereby allowing only one of the two hands to be available for typing). But your humble blogger decided to save you the time of reading about such a meaningless topic, by instead writing about another topic. 

Unfortunately, this topic too, appears to be meaningless, but I guess you are just out of luck because my mind has been set, and there's no going back (at least no going back twice in one sitting). 

Before I start, however, I would like to briefly go over what I may have written in the blog entry had I decided to talk about typing with one hand while talking on a phone. I may have talked about the difficulty of such a futile endeavor, while qualifying my opinion with the mere fact that I had just done it anyways and will most definitely do it again in the future. Maybe I would have gone on to talk about the inner-workings of the human mind, which have led me (or any other equally intelligent person) to attempt said act, thereby enlightening you, my wonderful readers. Or maybe I would have just went on a rant about what happened to me while I was, voluntarily or involuntarily (whichever you would like to believe), typing away, with one hand of course. Is there anyway to know for sure what would have happened? No.

At this point, you may be wondering when I will start the topic of this entry. Your patience has paid off, for here it is.

The sky is blue.

The end.

I don't understand

Interestingly enough, I was watching the movie Battle Royal in Japanese with Korean subtitles last night, when after about an hour I realized, "Something is wrong". Which is when I realized that neither am I able to understand Japanese nor read Korean. But can I understand Korean or read Japanese? Hopefully I will find a movie in the future which will help me find this out. But in the meantime, I guess I will just have to go on living my life without this crucial knowledge.

PS. Please see previous note for a very important mission/challenge/responsibility/duty/requirement.

We want you!!!!!!!!!

So you must have checked back many times over the course of the last week and wondered... Why aren't there any brilliant new entries? I would have to say... Really? Come on, pay attention. Go back and read the first entry, it will explain it all.

Now, it has come to my attention that not too many people have started reading this blog yet. So, I will have to keep this entry short, because face it, these words are too important to be wasted. I know, I know, I must have just bursted your bubble. But face it, you are not that special. Just kidding, but I will post a challenge. Go, recruit new readers. Then, maybe, just maybe, you will be able to find on these pages what can honestly only be described as "Written bliss". 

So go, go my minions and recruit... Recruit away.

Princess

Here is a story for you. It is a short story that I previously wrote and some of you (if anyone is actually reading) may have already seen. If you haven't, well then, you aren't that special are you? And if you have, don't you worry, new stories are yet to come, but I will save them for a time when readers are abound. In either case, here it is. Enjoy or at least pretend to enjoy. 

In a land far, far away, there lived a princess. Before your imaginations get ahead of themselves, she was not pretty. Many nations fell to their doom just by glancing at her disfigured face. At this point, I would implore you not to picture her in your head, for nothing good can come of it. Aided by the blind, one mighty and honorable king was able to destroy her. Not much of a story I know, but a story nonetheless.

The First One

Come read my daily blog (and by daily, I don't actually mean daily. What I really mean is "whenever I feel like posting something" blog. But you know, that's kind of difficult to write, so I chose to write daily instead. Why are you questioning me so much? Please, stop).

You may ask: What can a poor, lonely soul like myself expect to find on these glorious pages of your wonderful, stupendous, enormously spectacular blog? (Hey, your words, not mine) My answer would have to be: anything. Somedays you may find stories, other days observations, maybe even opinions, and then there will be days where you will find nothing at all.

Just a fair word of warning. You will very likely come across posts that will make little to no sense. Maybe it will make you think, maybe it will make you laugh, or maybe it will confuse you. Honestly, I really don't care, so quit your complaining....OR rejoicing. And if something is really on your mind, then just leave a comment.

So to sum up... Expect very little, and you won't be disappointed.

So check back soon...check back regularly...check back whenever you have time. Follow my advice, and you'll enjoy.